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Memoirs of a Forklift Addict

*warning contains implied violence and blood*

Urk And Forklift


*me iz Urk. me orc. me likes forklift!*

*forklift strong like Urk. forklift tough and fierce! Urk work with forklift. fun!*

*me slow. forklift fast. me wan be quick like forklift. wif forklift, Urk can krush elves. me no like pointy ear elves. chief must buy more forklift from humans.*

Urk Challenge All

*me am gooder than humans at forklift. humans stoopid. zug zug. me like youtube. youtube funny. see stoopid human on forklift fail make Urk laffAnd laff more. me favoret iz this one at 0.31 *

Stoopid Human

More Stoopid Human

Most Stoopid Human

*Urk wan join human forklift championship. Urk iz orc champion! zug zug. dis human good. Urk iz gooder. me will prove Urk strongest at forklift den human. me am challenge humans to forklift! Urk iz best at forklift!


*Urk work hard buy beef. strong orc like beef. weak orc like fish.*

*me now hungry. where food?*

(the rest of the memoir is covered in indelible blood stains)

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